My Election Hangover and Cure

November 6th, 2024

The election results were in. A wave of red had swept across the country, leaving me feeling like I'd woken up with a political hangover. It wasn't just the outcome; it was the way people had voted, the things they'd said, the values they seemed to embrace. My inner Judge was activated, its gavel slamming down on news notifications, social media posts, and even some conversations.

"How could they?" the Judge roared, its voice a hammer against my skull. "Are they blind? Selfish? Ignorant? Can't they see the damage this will cause?"

Each accusation reverberated through me, leaving a bitter taste. I felt a buzzing “dis-ease” in my body (negativity doesn’t feel good). It was fainter than after past elections, a testament to years spent taming this inner critic. Still, it lingered. The Judge, never satisfied, also turned its glare inward. "You could have done more," it hissed, "More vocal, more donations, more listening..."

The weight of its judgment was uncomfortable – not crushing like in previous years. It was clear I was gaining ground on my Judge, but the frustration, disbelief, and fear of what might come were simmering under my skin – a toxic cocktail fueled by the Judge's negativity.

Unlike in previous election cycles, I quickly noticed my Judge in action this time. Instead of it taking weeks or months – this time, it was just a few minutes. (Though I'll admit, I did give myself a few hours to mourn and fuss. I may or may not have sent a couple of crass jokes circulating on social media to a few close friends.) But I'm familiar with how this Judge operates. It's a saboteur, a relic of my evolutionary past, hardwired to focus on the negative for survival purposes. It wasn't the “truth”; it was just a distorted lens, magnifying flaws and fueling negativity.

I took a deep breath and consciously shifted my focus. Instead of judging, I tried to understand. What were the fears and anxieties driving those who voted differently? What were their hopes and dreams? What were the underlying issues that fueled their choices?

It's not easy. And honestly I don’t fully understand it all yet. The Judge wants to fight back, throwing up roadblocks of anger and resentment. But with each conscious shift, with each act of empathy, I'm loosening the Judge's grip.

Curiosity is replacing condemnation. I increased the number of different perspectives I was exposed to, reading articles from across the political spectrum again, engaging in respectful dialogue with those I disagreed with. Instead of seeing enemies, I'm choosing to see people – complex, flawed, hopeful people (just like me).

This doesn't mean condoning harmful views or accepting injustice. It means recognizing the humanity in everyone, even those I vehemently disagree with. And in that recognition, I'm already finding a path forward.

The Judge is still going to rear its head, of course. But now, I'm confident I can recognize it for what it is – a saboteur, not a sage. And when it tries to drag me down into the mire of negativity, I plan to choose a different path – I choose empathy, understanding, and action. Because that's how we build bridges, heal divides, and create a better future, together.

#mentalfitness #positiveintelligence #PQMentalfitness