How to Be More Decisive
A client of mine recently shared “I don’t know what to do. There are too many routes I could take. I want to make the right decision. I’m being too indecisive…” She spun in confusion and got overwhelmed about what to do next.
Can you relate?
I sure can. I’m currently trying to decide what neighborhoods to move to in Sydney and which school would be the best match for our kids.
The question that keeps nagging me is: have I done enough research to make an informed decision that is best for my family?
The same goes for my client. It’s easy for us to indulge in confusion and be indecisive about things. It often feels less scary than making the decision.
But I’ve had to remind myself and my client that after a certain amount of research, not making a decision is a decision itself! We’re choosing to let the universe or others make a decision for us. Is that what we want?
No! I’d rather have a say. And being decisive offers a lot of benefits:
It saves us time instead of being in limbo.
It increases our action and contributions in the world, instead of just consuming more information, food or alcohol while we keep “researching” more options.
It increases our growth. Being in action is where we experiment and learn what works and what doesn’t.
It increases our confidence. We expand our experiences with each decision.
Here are some ways to be more decisive, many of which I learned from my teacher and coach Brooke Castillo. Give them a try and see what works for you.
1. Write down your priorities and goals ahead of time, and make sure they are in alignment with your values so you don’t have hidden beliefs blocking you from making decisions.
2. Give yourself parameters for your research and a time limit for making a decision.
3. Know that there is no wrong decision. Go all in for your first choice but know that if it doesn’t work out, you’ve got your own back. You won’t make it worse by beating yourself up. You are smart enough to turn any outcome into a gift or opportunity. You made the best decision you had with the information at the time and honor that. What is meant to happen will happen.
4. Questions to ask yourself:
What advice would your future elder self give you 10-15 years from now?
If both decisions turn out amazing, which one would you choose?
What would love do?
Would you choose it if there was no history or bias?
What if failure were no big deal?
What if you could say yes to both things?
Does this move you towards the person you want to be?
What is the best and worst-case scenario, and can I troubleshoot the worst case scenario?
Answer all of these and see which ones energize you and move you forward.
If you want more support digging into these questions, reach out to me. I’d love to support you. Simply be decisive and send me an email!