Do you easily get hijacked by your emotions when there is a bump in the road or life doesn’t go as planned?
It takes a certain level of mental fitness to respond to life’s challenges with a positive mindset instead of a negative one.
How do you build that resilience? Are you mentally fit enough for life’s curve balls?
Read MoreDo you believe physical fitness/wellness is a worthy lifelong pursuit? It affects your memory, overall health, strength, quality of sleep, weight and ability to combat diseases, etc. It’s often a core tenet of self-care these days.
What about mental fitness? Do you give it equal weight?
Mental fitness is the capacity to respond to life’s great challenges with a positive mindset instead of a negative one. It allows you to reduce mental stress, frustration and negative emotions.
Ever feel like your schedule controls you? Let's flip that narrative. Make it work for you! Here are 10 scheduling tips that will put you back in the driver's seat, improve your scheduling process and set you up for success.
Read MoreDo you crave a sense of calm and ease in your life? More time for the things you love? Perhaps it's taking more walks with loved ones. Reading a juicy novel or writing one yourself. Or maybe you aren’t sure what you want exactly, just that you want space to figure it out.
I get it. Crafting a fulfilling work-life balance that is nurturing to your well-being is sort of an art, a dance that ebbs and flows with your unique life’s rhythms. There is no one way to do it. I’m always in a conversational dance with it, tweaking it as my needs and desires change.
But when I start to feel an imbalance - usually noted by feelings like stress, frustration or overwhelm - I check in on the following five areas to help me find synergy again:
Read MoreDo you have a voice in your head that constantly finds fault with yourself, others or the circumstances in your life?
It’s pretty normal. It’s part of our physiological negativity bias and survival instinct to scan for danger. The voice pretends to be your friend and has probably “helped” you through some tough physical or emotional situations.
But in the end, the Judge is your number one enemy in life. It impacts your well-being, happiness and success far more than most other things. Why? Because the Judge is the cause of much of our disappointment, anger, regret, guilt, shame, and anxiety.
Last week I introduced you to James Clear’s four 4 laws to creating a good habit from his book Atomic Habits. Make it (1) obvious, (2) attractive, (3) easy and (4) satisfying. If you missed it you can read it here.
But many of you were left hanging with the question, but how do I break a bad habit? 😜
Fear not, I got you. I have a few myself that I'm working on and Mr. Clear outlines 4 laws to follow to break any undesirable habit you’re ready to let go of.
His solution is to do the OPPOSITE of creating a good habit: Make it (1) invisible, (2) unattractive, (3) difficult and (4) unsatisfying.
So let’s dive in.
Read MoreHow to apply James Clear’s 4 Laws of Behavior Change to forming good habits in your life: Make it obvious, attractive, easy and satisfying.
Read MoreAs part of my 100 day breathwork project I read the book Breath: The New Science of a Lost Art by James Nestor. In it Nestor argues that breath is the missing pillar of health today, that 90% of us are breathing incorrectly and that many modern maladies such as anxiety, ADHD, asthma, psoriasis and more could be reduced or reversed by changing how we inhale or exhale.
It was an interesting read. Some of the assertions were based on science and some anecdotal. He basically encourages us to take our breath seriously and optimize it by focusing on these 8 principals:
Read MoreLove or heart notes are a fun way to plant the seeds of self-esteem and courage in your kids. It is a written communication that expresses unconditional love to your child. It can either be a note of love or a reflection of a past positive event.
For example, “Dear H, I have great memories of rafting down the river with you last summer and chatting about Minecraft. Love, Mom”
You leave it somewhere where they will find it and read it on their own, like on their desk, lunch box or notebook. Be creative and have fun with it. You can use sticky notes, index cards or get fancy if you are the artsy type. The key is not to ask if they saw them or what they thought of them. Just write them and let them go.
Read MoreDo you suffer from imposter syndrome sometimes? Are you anxious that you aren’t smart enough, don’t know enough or won’t be able to keep up with your peers? Are you afraid of making a mistake, not knowing the right answer or not doing the right thing? Have you ever felt like a fraud and that people were going to find out? If so, you aren’t alone. I’ve been there and so has around 70% of the population.
But here’s the skinny on imposter syndrome. It’s not an affliction or a genetic predisposition. It’s just a collection of negative thoughts you have about yourself.
Your brain has a bias towards critical self-talk and you’ve gotten in the habit of believing it.
I celebrated my birthday this weekend. I started to announce to myself that I was happy to close the chapter on this year, that it generally sucked. My mind raced through all the annoyances, grievances and missed opportunities. It was easy to think good riddance to 46.
And then I SAW myself. I watched my brain IN ACTION, having a field day with negative thoughts. It raised a big old RED FLAG and I smiled. It was a familiar sight! “Hello negativity bias, I know you well.”
It’s a knee jerk reaction I have, to see the negative things to the exclusion of all the positive aspects of my life.
Can you relate?
Read MoreHave you noticed that your brain often thinks in “all or nothing” terms? Like “I can’t possibly continue to work from home under these conditions.”
We love to think in all or nothing terms because there is no resistance or cognitive dissonance in our brains. Decision making is simpler when things are black and white. Our brains like it when things are clear.
But here’s the thing, all or nothing thinking also limits us our growth. It makes the price of taking risks higher and keeps us stuck where we are and closed to new possibilities.
Read MoreDo you feel like you are out of control sometimes? Like the desire to eat that pint of ice-cream is just too strong? Like you don’t have a choice?
Most of us think desire is innate, something we either have or don’t have. Like you are attracted to someone or not. But the truth is desire is something we LEARN by repeating it over and over until our brain recognizes it as a pattern and takes it out of our prefrontal cortex where it takes a lot of brain power and moves it back to the midbrain so it becomes automatic.
So your desire for junk food seems involuntary because it’s something you’ve programmed into your mind. It feels intense because of the concentrated REWARD associated with it, a flood of dopamine to your brain.
Read MoreHappy New Year! May your 2021 be full of health, love and fulfillment.
Many of you have either set goals, chosen a word/mantra, or set an intention that will be your guide for the year.
Some of you find this stifling and you prefer to coddiwomple your way through the year instead (to travel in a purposeful manner towards a vague destination).
Others like to pray to their Gods or do a combination of the above. The choices and approaches are endless.
There is no right or wrong way to do things. There is only what works for you. It never hurts to experiment and try things on until you find the right fit for YOU.
Read MoreHow self-confident are you? On a scale of 1-10 how would you rate yourself? Is your self-confidence holding you back in any way in your professional or personal life? If so, I have some good news. It's not a gene that some of us are born with, but a muscle you can develop and become skilled in.
Here are 3 steps you can take to build your self-confidence starting today:
Read MoreDo you have big dreams you’d love to accomplish, if only you had the self-confidence to go after them?!
People often think self-confidence is an innate gift that a lucky few are born with or that you gain through lots of experience over time.
The truth is self-confidence is accessible to everyone. It is a state of being that is created in your mind and you can start cultivating it right away!
Why? Because it comes from inside you - from your thoughts.
Self-confidence is faith in your ability to learn, try and not give up! It is future oriented. You don’t need to have any evidence from your past that you can do it. You are secure in your ability to figure it out.
What would you like to achieve in 2021 but feel scared to do?
Are you held back by your fears, waiting around for them to magically disappear someday so you can manifest your dreams?Wish there was a courage pill so you could fast track the process? 😁
Luckily there is a solution: Cultivate courage and take action with fear by your side.
You don’t have to do it alone. I can help you.
Here are 7 steps to get you started:
Are you taking control of who you want to be?
Have you asked yourself recently who you want to become? Is your vision limited by what you've achieved in the PAST?
Do you say things like:
I’ve had that issue my entire life.
That’s how I’ve always done it.
That doesn’t work for me. I’ve tried it.
If this sounds like you, you’re most likely defining yourself by stories of your past. You are subconsciously looking for evidence from your past to prove your current belief system and where you are headed.
But your past does not need to dictate your future. You get to decide.
Read MoreUnlocking the transformative power of gratitude is worth your time because studies show that it leads to:
More a satisfied life and a hopeful future.
Stronger relationships because of a tendency to show appreciation for loved ones.
Health benefits like stronger immunity, lower blood pressure and better sleep.
Improved mental health like reduced depression and anxiety.
Improved resilience, protecting us from the turbulence of an uncertain world.
If you are ready to kickstart following through on your dreams, keep reading!
I’ve been dreaming of learning how to play guitar for decades.
By now I know what it takes to move forward on this dream. I’m going to have to choose to be uncomfortable on purpose for a while.
Here’s my plan and six steps you can take to achieve your goal/dream as well:
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